My boyfriend of only a year has decided to evaluate the relationship. We have been fighting recently but the last fight was the breaking point. There have been some issues from the beginning (even though I don’t consider them issues). He is 23 and I am 20 which he doesn’t like the age difference. Another is that he ABSOLUTLY hates drinking alcohol (deals with his past) and I drink (not an alcoholic). He claims that he tried to deal with it but doesn’t think he can. Also, in our last fight we were arguing about alcohol(not me drinking, just in general) and he said, “I can not have a serious relationship with someone who drinks.” To which I completely flipped out because he never said that before. He claimed it was said in the heat of the moment but he started on about me drinking. To which I ended up saying, “I’ll just shut my mouth and agree with you.” I said that because it seems that if I don’t agree with him on certain subjects (like this one) he can’t accept the fact that I do..
think differently. So from what I said he started on about how he can’t trust me (since I said I would just agree with him) and went on to say that we don’t work. This is really hard on me. I really would like to talk with him about this but all I get is “I have doubts about us.” I’m still hurt by what he said and then turning the argument about me. The whole age thing is something I can’t change which is completely frustrating. And I doubt if he would even want to compromise with the alcohol issue. Even so I don’t want the relationship to end at all, I’m happy with him and I do love him. I haven’t told him that part yet since I wanted to tell him person but haven’t had the chance (which really sucks now). I don’t know what to do about this whole thing, I feel like he is going to break up with me anyways. But at the same time I don’t want to force myself to do something just because of him or reduce myself to begging him not to break up with me. Hope this all made sense.
Also, he is not a recovering alcoholic and my drinking is like 1-2 drinks maybe every other 2-3 months. So we both are not alcoholics.
These are to many added details. But I don’t drink around him (only two times). And I’ve never been drunk before nor have I’ve done anything from having a drink. It is emotional for him but only because of his past when he was young and with his family.